Rap's Cupid Misses the Mark on Certified Lover Boy

I try really hard to like Drake's music, I promise I do. It seems like it should be easy to do -- for Christ's sake, he's the most-streamed, best-selling artist of all time. I mean, everyone has a handful of favorite Drizzy songs, and when his album releases happen, these songs stay in rotation for months. I never thought I'd hear the end of "Keke, do you love me?" 

Yet, good or bad, all things must come to an end, and even 2018's "In My Feelings" left the Billboard lists to make way for new blood. Although Drake's career and ability to chart higher than any other artist ever seems endless, despite the continued monotony of his musical quality. He seems to be the exception to the age-old adage.

All this to his name, and yet I can't help but feel let down by the hype surrounding Drake drops. My disappointment in the Canadian crooner's sixth LP is mostly rooted in early promises that Certified Lover Boy would be a stark departure from his most recent, hour and a half snoozers Scorpion and Views. There were promises that the album would be focused on his rapping ability and less on his R&B vocals -- which wasn't the case. Like Scorpion, the album is split almost down the middle with rap songs and R&B hits.

Quite possibly, these promises were true at one point, but the release was met with a multitude of delays, where it was once promised in January of this year. Following "Laugh Now, Cry Later" (which is unfortunately absent from CLB) and his Scary Hours 2 EP, Drake was silent for many months. The status of the album was in doubt until mid-August when rumors surfaced of an imminent release.

Nonetheless, the album suffers several misfires. "Champagne Poetry," the album's opener and second-longest track, seems like a hell of a start. Drake speaks on being a parent, something many fans and critics alike once critiqued him for not doing enough. But the track quickly sprawls across the five and a half minutes into typical braggadocio. 

No matter how hard even the most popular artist of our time may try, no one can remix Right Said Fred's "I'm Too Sexy" into something of a decent song. It can't be done.

Still, there are a lot of great Drake moments across the album: moody beats accompanied by lyrics addressing forlorn attempts at love with Instagram models. And speaking of Instagram, his rhymes are chockful of caption-worthy memorable punchlines. His collaboration with Future, "N 2 Deep," is a highlight of the album, reminiscent of What A Time to be Alive days. 

Jay-Z (whom Drake proclaimed "the GOAT") has the best verse on Certified, hands down. "Love All" sees Jay explain his disdain for enemies and snakes on a song Drake wrote about tequila.

We haven't yet mentioned Drake's use of an R. Kelly sample on the track "TSU" -- and maybe we shouldn't touch that with a 60-foot pole -- but Drake's conscious inclusion of the extremely controversial artist's work seems tone-deaf at best. Drake's longtime friend and producer, Noah "40" Shabib released a statement saying the sample was unavoidable due to the intro, but, just a thought... don't include the intro...?

Despite his success and record-breaking numbers, Drake's evolution as an artist is static, while his peers and the generations beneath him continue to reevaluate not only their place in the "rap game," but revolutionize the industry itself. Certified Lover Boy is more of the same, to the point where it feels like this album (and Scorpion and Views, for that matter) is just reworked material from past projects. 

Evolution isn't necessary to make great music, no. Just look at Young Thug, look at Future, look at any number of trap artists constantly making platinum records. There isn't a stark difference between their work ten years ago and today, but the music is good. Drake's CLB tracks, "7AM On Bridle Path" and "The Remorse," are not even the best Drake takes on the material in those songs. Hopefully, on this next album (that should be at least a year away), Mr. OVO can find a way to stay loyal to his material while giving listeners something fresh and interesting.

Regardless, it's safe to say Drake will stay making music for house parties and social media. No matter how much time off he seems to take to perfect his craft and rework his albums, they all end up falling the same on my ears. But what does my take mean? He'll still sell 400k plus the first week on streaming alone. The man knows how to cater to his strengths.

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Is Certified Lover Boy a return to form for Drake or a letdown? Correct me below in the comment section or holler at us on Twitter!

- Ritter